From One Red Door to Another

If you’re a renter, a college student or live in a college town, more than likely you noticed an influx of people this weekend. Yup, it was that time of year again, moving time. And this year more than any other year, I felt like part of the majority. Luckily I have a great new landlord. He let me and my roommate move in early. For those of you who have not had to move on the busiest move-in day of the year, this was a HUGE help. I was settled in before the Tufts students even packed their cars. Needless to say, I was able to enjoy the end of my Labor Day weekend while others were still laboriously lugging furniture and boxes.

It was during this arduous process that I noticed a fun, but interesting coincidence about my new and old apartments. Our first apartment was the bottom floor of a house. It was spacious for three people. We loved the character that it has, great hard wood floors and original doors. The only downside was the plaster walls. They made it very difficult to hang anything of substance on the walls. The new apartment is about a mile away from our cute little three bedroom. It is a two bedroom (got to LOVE downsizing!) in an apartment complex. It has a small balcony, not nearly as much character, but has good walls that can hold anything. The one thing that these two “homes” have in common is a red door…

Old diggs...

New diggs...

I know what you’re thinking. Who cares about the color of a door? It doesn’t matter; it’s something that you walk through, that keeps unwanted “guests” out. That is true. But let me explain... I love color. I feel like it's one of the best forms of self-expression. For those of you who follow color theory, red is a warm color associated with positivity, strength, and a will to survive. According to the website empower-yourself-with-color-psychology.com, the color red is “energizing…excites the emotions and motivates us to take action.” In other words, it is a strong color emitting confidence and a passion for life.

To me this means something. As a person who has officially been a college graduate for over a year and living on my own for almost a year, it makes me feel like I am on the right path. Let me back up. I don’t think it’s a coincidence, but a sign from God that I am doing the right things for me at this moment. I may be young and living a hectic life, but for right now, I think this is the path that I am supposed to be on. I am making the right choices passionately, whole-heartedly. I am trying to figure out who I am, why I am here, my purpose in life, all the while motivated to live every second of life, good and bad. And as stupid as it sounds (at least I have the confidence to admit it) the color of my door gives me hope, strength. I am still chugging, still pushing through, thriving. I am still here, living, wanting, needing, learning, growing. And for now, that’s all I need. Be young, but mature. Love with your whole heart. Take risks, open up with the energy and determination that others around me have shown their entire life. Laugh with every ounce of your being. Live with the warmth that you would want from others. And above all embody the color red.

Still Here... Adapting....

If you live near the East Coast, you’ve either been seeing huge rain drops pelting your street or feeling what may be the last official heat wave of the summer. Needless to say, with my complete disdain for heat AND humidity in the same place at the same time, I was lucky enough to experience 90 degree temperatures with dew points reaching into the high 60s. Lovely.  Walking from the Park Street T stop in Boston to office on Boylston Street is usually light and fun. This week it left me feeling like I needed a shower, a trenta iced coffee, and a nap. But for me, that isn’t what I hated most about the heat. It’s trying to sleep in it without AC.

This may be one of the last times I have to do so as the new apartment that I am moving into has a wall unit (SCORE!), but it did not change the fact that I was utterly uncomfortable laying in my bed wearing as little clothing as possible. All I wanted was that cool spot on the pillow, that one section of mattress that was still untouched by my heat-radiating body. Alas, I always ended-up throwing my blanket off in the middle of the night, just so that my fan could blow a breeze DIRECTLY onto my body. So comfortable…

tumblr.com

Yes, this sleeping pattern seemed all too familiar to me. Why do you ask? Because not only am I trying so hard to sleep comfortably by moving my foot around the bed, searching for the one thing that will give me releif, but I feel that I am doing the same in life. I want to live comfortably. I am trying so very hard to become comfortable with myself. Yet, no matter how hard I try, how hard I try a different approach, I feel like I’m still searching for that "cold spot in my bed." I’m coming up short, searching for that one thing that will finally yield a more content and comfortable person.

I know we’re not supposed to have it all figured out by the age of 24... I’m not delusional. But why is it so hard to get there? I am not so sure that I like the person I am or who I am becoming, which right now seems to be a workaholic, exercise/healthy eating fiend who has big dreams, but limited time to pursue them all…

Don’t get me wrong! It’s fun living on your own, making your own decisions, truly being independent. But it’s scary too. Part of me still felt like I was going back to my beloved alma mater this fall. That this last year was just a year-long internship and that I would move back into a dorm room with my best friends and have the world at my fingertips. But recently, I feel like these ideas are slipping away, just like the cool spots from my bed…

So alas, I turn BACK TO THIS BLOG. To share my feelings of adapting with you, whoever you may be. Maybe your having the same feelings, maybe you have "been there, done that." But bare with me as I figure it out myself. 

I will leave you on a happy note, with my new favorite song that gets me amped for another day! Enjoy!

#PrayForBoston

Today has been a crazy day for me. And yet, God’s Word, especially today has made me feel at peace. This morning as I trudged into work, crossing Arlington Street and continuing down Boylston, I was amazed at how festive the streets of Boston looked for the Boston Marathon. I was jealous of those being able to enjoy the festivities, while I had to work in my stuffy office just a stone’s throw from the finish line. What a tease! How I longed to be down there, experiencing all of the greatness that is the finish line of the Boston Marathon… Then tragedy stuck. My office shook with terror… A building of 27 floors shook with a terrible boom that made us all think it was a cannon or even an earthquake… I was wrong… How wrong I was.

Boylston, Street, Boston, MA: 8:30am

This morning on my way into town I was a little late leaving the house. I thought, “I really need to watch my stress level. I should just get up a little bit earlier to get just a little bit more work done while everyone else is out of the office.” How ironic that thought is now.

The events at the Boston Marathon completely filled my mind as I sit here tonight. Even still, I am able to find some peace. Psalm 107: 19...This verse hold great meaning to me. So many are ailing tonight. So many, including me, are frightened to be in their homes. Yet, I know one thing to be true above all. God with me and those that are in distress. He can hear our pain, Boston's pain. He knows that evil is out there, but when we ask for help, he hears us and comforts us.

 

Boylston Street, Boston, MA:  2:45pm, minutes before explosions.

I know one thing tonight… I am thankful for my family and friends, those that I love. And my heart and prayers go out the victims.… “Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble, and he saved them from their distress…” Thank you to all of the police and firefighters for keeping us as safe as possible today. You are making me feel just that much better. I am proud to be a Bostonian, an American. #prayforBoston

Boston Common, Boston, MA:  4:45pm

Dare to Dream

Here I am. It's Thursday. And I'm by myself. I do have two roommates (Emma and Michelle, see below. Oh how I love them so) and they are not here. So it with my best intentions that I turn to writing...and maybe some wine... and my two favorite guilty pleasures (cue horny vampires and lustful doctors).

On my way home today, I had the bittersweet pleasure of walking home in snow flurries. Yes, it is the second day of spring, and I am sick of the thought of snow. But the way the flakes were softly falling, coating the cold pavement that is still trying to thaw from the last 10 inches we got just days ago makes the world seem perfectly at peace. And my mind couldn't help but wander. Dreaming. What young adult girls do best.

I love New England. I love the seasons (or lack there of in the recent years) and the foliage. I love the sense of community in Boston. But this is not where my dreams were taking place. They were in an unknown city. A place I have never seen before. I saw myself living there. In my own apartment, a cute studio with a small fire escape that I could climb onto and watch the people in the streets below. Maybe this will happen in Boston. Maybe it will be in San Diego or Atlanta. Or possibly even Chicago. But, it was somewhere. And I strive and long to be on my own.

As exciting as this dream is, this is a scary thought. I have lived with people, friends and family, my entire life. But if my day dreams involve me, on my own, for at least a couple of years, months, days it means that it is ultimately something I want... Something I need to grow and become the best person, friend, sister, daughter, girlfriend, niece, future wife, Christian, that I can be.


It is at this moment that a quote from one of the greatest modern musicians (not just because he was a fellow clarinetist) popped into my head:

"Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars."

~Lester Raymond "Les" Brown, Sr.

In honor of Mr. Brown's words, here are some of my inspirations... I'm drooling just looking at them... dreaming of the day they will be mine (cue Crosby Stills Nash and Young...)

 

Couldn't help but include this awesome picture from Kate Spade NY's tumblr page. Oh to be that care free woman on that fire escape, just dreaming

It's Been a While...

Here it is. Almost spring. How ironic is it that the last time I wrote was when Nemo dumped three feet of snow on New England... No matter. I am here ready to share my thoughts once more. 

Do you ever feel like the majority of your time is spent waiting? Waiting for the bus. Waiting in line at the grocery store. Waiting for a special package or letter in the mail. Waiting for a cherished moment with a special someone. Waiting for Earth's signs that spring really is going to perk up once more... Just waiting. 

I have been feeling like this recently. Not so much in my career path or even my social life. More so in my personal life, as in my relationship with me. I feel like I am waiting for a better me. A smarter, more caring, more relaxed person. Within twenty-four hours this past weekend, I was told that I am too organized. I like planning outings, but that I can be too thorough and too up tight if something goes awry. I like to do fun things, but I can't appreciate the little things in life. And this made me think.

I do appreciate the little things...at least in nature. I love the sounds of birds chirping or the wind blowing through my hair. I love riding horses through the natural beauty that surrounds us on a normal basis. I love the  warmth of precious rays of sun during the cold, frigid days of winter. But what about the sound of a friend's laugh, the hug of a family member, or even the quickest look from a loved one that says everything you need to hear without without him having to actually open his mouth. 

When it comes to other people, live human beings, I fall short. We all do. Instead of meeting up with someone over lunch, we Facebook message them or send them a #ShoutOut on Twitter. When we want to catch up with a long lost friend, we will send an email instead of picking up the phone and letting them hear our voice. We're impersonal. 

Now I may not be able to change the world and the culture that we live in. I am just one person. But I can control my actions. And that is what I vow to do, appreciate human contact while also valuing the beautiful world we live in. Maybe this will make all this waiting, anticipating, disappear. 

(www.wonderfullymadebelliesandbabies.blogspot.com)

New England Found Nemo...

View from my window

...or better yet, Nemo found us. This weekend's past storm was one for the history books. Nemo was the fifth largest snow fall in Boston history. Friday afternoon through Saturday night, the threat of Nemo cancelled flights, caused parking and driving bans throughout the state of Massachusetts, and even shut down the public transportation services in and around Boston.


I have lived through many snowfalls, blizzards and record-breaking snowstorms. Yet, amazement ensued when I looked out my window onto my street that Saturday morning. I could not believe the snow piles on top of cars and roofs, the snow-covered streets and sidewalks. It was the most peaceful I had ever seen a city... Everything looked new and white. Crisp and clean, and very cold.


As soon as we were able to work up enough courage to bundle up and muster outside, my roommate Michelle and I slowly realized that the city was not snowed in; it was very much alive. People were not driving down the streets in their cars. Oh no. They were skiing and walking down them. Families and friends were sledding down snowbanks and piles, while throwing snowballs at each other. I felt like everyone was just happy to have each other. I saw so many happy faces, young and old. And it made this new found city-girl realize something...

Union Square- Somerville, MA

No matter where you are, family and friends are the most important thing in life. Like the little fish with the gimpy fin in the Disney classic Finding Nemo (I couldn't help this reference...), there may be things that make us different or traumatic events in our lives. But we must all keep our heads up and focus on the positive. We must appreciate the people we have in our lives even though they may be annoying or pests. We are all loved by someone. Focus on those people and the little things that happen in that relationship. And I'm sure at the end of it all, you will be happy too!




So thanks Nemo, for refreshing these thoughts in my mind. Thank you for renewing my hope in humanity. And most of all, thank you for the awesome images of a little clown fish swimming above New England. Hopefully, I can keep these positive feelings for a very long, long time.

Bon A Petiet

Many people love Fridays. Who wouldn't? It's finally the weekend. We look forward to two full days of freedom. No nose-to-the-grind mentality. No reporting to the clock. No worries. And I am one of these people. But do not mistaken my love for adoration. I adore Sundays. Cherish them. This one day is what you may call the "holy grail" of my week.

I don't really know why I like this day so much. It could be because this was the day that my family set aside to be together. Or maybe it was because I always woke up early on this day to go to church. Or it could be because my favorite sport is played on this day during the year (football of course!). No matter the reason my earliest memories of Sundays all involve food. Yup, that delicious home-cooked meal that my Mom or Nana would make. Oh the stews, roasted turkey, meatballs, and casseroles. The burgers, potatoes,  pork roasts, and chicken cacciatore. How I love that food...

Since moving out of my house, I have missed those meals and thus came to a conclusion. I have decided to dedicate this day to cooking. Food-prep for the week. Baking. Roasting. Sauteing. I just want to make that Sunday dinner I so looked forward to while living at home. Recently, I have shared the few meals I have made on Sunday with my roommates and loving boyfriend. I love cooking for others and my love of "food Sundays."

I find these meals delectable. Recently, I have made rosemary chicken with asparagus and sauteed potatoes and some veggie pasta dish. But today I'm trying something new. Starting today, I want to make some of those home-cooked meals like the ones my Mom makes (yes, she still cooks Sunday dinner for everyone who is home). This week it will be Beef Stroganoff with Mustard Brussels Sprouts. I am looking forward to this new Sunday activity. It's a great end to my favorite day...

I am thinking I will post pictures of my creations for you all to see and feel free to leave suggestions. Until then, I will use the French phrase made popular by the queen of television cooking herself, Julia Child. "Bon A Petiet" and enjoy the rest of your Sunday!

Quick and Easy Beef Stroganoff from Cooking Light
http://www.myrecipes.com/recipe/quick-beef-stroganoff-50400000125714

"What We Call the Beginning...

...is often the end. And to make an end is to make a beginning. The end is where we start from."

-T.S. Eliot

Here is a fun fact about me. I don't like saying goodbyes. In any way, shape, or form. I try my best to avoid them... And today is my last full day at my first job. And I am dreading saying goodbye. I will miss the friendships I created here, the working environment. The great experiences I have cultivated first hand, the mistakes I have made. But I felt the need to move on, which resulted in my taking of a new job at a much bigger business. While only about a mile from my current office, I am still moving. Different roles and responsibilities, different location in my beloved Boston, different industry... I am leaving the non-profit industry, at least for now (I do still dream of coming back to this industry. Helping people is one of my passions!). But I have to learn and grow. I need to learn more about marketing and PR. I feel the need to grow, but I hate saying goodbye...

So I turn to my man, T.S.Eliot. There are such words of wisdom in his pieces...Above he states that in order to have a new beginning, many times it leads to an end, or a goodbye. But goodbyes do not have to be goodbyes; they can be welcomes, or hellos, or even a see you later. So embrace the endings in your life. See the light through the clouds (see the picture below...sometimes I amaze myself with my past experiences and how essential they are). Know that many things are only possible from taking chances and leaving your comfort zone.

So thank you to my Komen MA family. I have loved working with you and look forward to our paths crossing again in the future. And hello to my next adventure. It will be different, but oh-so exciting. I am counting on that!

Sitka, Alaska