Trust that an End is Followed by a Beginning

Free People Blog

I love new beginnings, fresh starts, new seasons, resets, a new chapter, turning a new page...whatever you like to call them, these times in our lives are filled with excitement and anticipation of the unknown. Personally, I am love with the beginning of a new season, more specifically Fall and Spring. They are great seasons that aren't unbearably hot or bitterly cold. They produce new color in the world and are monumental changes for those who change their closets over like I do. Who doesn't like walking through the leaves in new boots and a great sweater while sipping a great pumpkin spice latte, or running outside in fresh air with a sweatshirt and shorts first time in months? Oh, these are my favorite times of the year. I detest the cold, bitter Winter (excluding Christmas of course) and the hot, humid unbearable heat of Summer (unless I am on a beach with my toes in the sand). If only it could be Fall and Spring year-round.



Boston Common - September 2014

But then these seasons wouldn't be season. I honestly do not know if I would look forward to them like I do now if there wasn't a change in season. So let's think about beginnings carefully... Why do we really like them so much? They're a change, a shift of energy. It's typically something ngeative to something positive. Sorry to get all scientific on you, but this is an example of the world's equilibrium, balancing negative energy with positive experiences.

I mean, really. Think about it. Has there ever been a time when a beginning isn't preceded by something life-changing? This happened to me this past month. A co-worker and dear friend of mine decided that she needed a fresh start. After much consideration, she decided to move to a new city thousands of miles away; life-changing decision for her, professionally and personally. And a life-changing for me, her friend. I will now have to get used to not seeing her every day and possibly not even talking to her every day. A bittersweet ending...


Boston Calling - September 2014

Literally, the day she left was the beginning of Fall, which we have already established is my favorite season. Mix of emotions, but a new beginning. This past Monday may have been her last day in Boston, but it was the first day of Fall... My equilibrium was not affected. Yes, my life is still adjusting to life without my friend in the same city that I reside, but my favorite season is here and so are the pumpkin spice lattes.

So though life brings changes, and yes some can be life-altering, know and trust that an end is always followed by a beginning.

xoxo~ Sarah

Still Here... Adapting....

If you live near the East Coast, you’ve either been seeing huge rain drops pelting your street or feeling what may be the last official heat wave of the summer. Needless to say, with my complete disdain for heat AND humidity in the same place at the same time, I was lucky enough to experience 90 degree temperatures with dew points reaching into the high 60s. Lovely.  Walking from the Park Street T stop in Boston to office on Boylston Street is usually light and fun. This week it left me feeling like I needed a shower, a trenta iced coffee, and a nap. But for me, that isn’t what I hated most about the heat. It’s trying to sleep in it without AC.

This may be one of the last times I have to do so as the new apartment that I am moving into has a wall unit (SCORE!), but it did not change the fact that I was utterly uncomfortable laying in my bed wearing as little clothing as possible. All I wanted was that cool spot on the pillow, that one section of mattress that was still untouched by my heat-radiating body. Alas, I always ended-up throwing my blanket off in the middle of the night, just so that my fan could blow a breeze DIRECTLY onto my body. So comfortable…

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Yes, this sleeping pattern seemed all too familiar to me. Why do you ask? Because not only am I trying so hard to sleep comfortably by moving my foot around the bed, searching for the one thing that will give me releif, but I feel that I am doing the same in life. I want to live comfortably. I am trying so very hard to become comfortable with myself. Yet, no matter how hard I try, how hard I try a different approach, I feel like I’m still searching for that "cold spot in my bed." I’m coming up short, searching for that one thing that will finally yield a more content and comfortable person.

I know we’re not supposed to have it all figured out by the age of 24... I’m not delusional. But why is it so hard to get there? I am not so sure that I like the person I am or who I am becoming, which right now seems to be a workaholic, exercise/healthy eating fiend who has big dreams, but limited time to pursue them all…

Don’t get me wrong! It’s fun living on your own, making your own decisions, truly being independent. But it’s scary too. Part of me still felt like I was going back to my beloved alma mater this fall. That this last year was just a year-long internship and that I would move back into a dorm room with my best friends and have the world at my fingertips. But recently, I feel like these ideas are slipping away, just like the cool spots from my bed…

So alas, I turn BACK TO THIS BLOG. To share my feelings of adapting with you, whoever you may be. Maybe your having the same feelings, maybe you have "been there, done that." But bare with me as I figure it out myself. 

I will leave you on a happy note, with my new favorite song that gets me amped for another day! Enjoy!

Looking Up

Looking up in New Hampshire after Hurricane Sandy, 2012

 

 

What a phrase... It's been used as a title for Michael J. Fox's book, "Things are Looking Up," described the behavior of the most powerful "super man" in the comic book world, and even featured in song lyrics like Selena's "Dreaming." But let's break it down for a second... The word "looking" implies the use of eyes to view something or someone. It requires one of our five senses, the sense of sight. Second, the word "up" gives the notion of something taller, bigger, or above a designated subject. Together this phrase can have multiple meanings.

It can have a literal meaning. "Joe was looking up into the eyes of a giant bear." Physically, Joe's head was tilted back to look up into the eyes of the bear which stood taller than he. Many of us look up to see things, whether it is to see a bird flying in the sky, a street sign, or, in my case, a friend that is taller than 5'5". We all have eyes that are positioned in the middle of our head; we have to look up to see anything above our heads. And if we never looked up, odds are we would never see the magnificent height of trees in a forest, the looming buildings of a cityscape, or the beauty of a flying bird.

"Looking up" can also have metaphorical meanings. Many times it is used to describe the behavior of someone who has recently experienced a traumatic or upsetting event. This could be a death in the family, the loss of a job, or even a bad grade in school. The most common response to one of these events, "Keep looking up," or "Keep your chin up. It will all get better." In this situation, "looking up" refers to keeping positive. Move forward, as hard as it may be. Stay confident, things can and will get better. In this type of situation, a negative situation produces positive support. The phrase used in this way needs a negative event to happen first. "Looking up," then, can have some negative connotations attached to it.

However, it can also have positive connotations when used with metaphorical meaning. Life may not necessarily be on the downward turn for you to start "looking up." Growth, change, opportunity. Dreaming of bigger and better things. "Looking up" can mean wanting more...

This is why I am currently "looking up." I have a great life; I have a job with great coworkers, a wonderful family, gracious friends, a caring and supportive boyfriend who loves me, and I'm living in a city which has been a dream of mine since the age of 5. Yet, I am looking up. I feel like I'm in a rut. I feel like I'm ready for a change. I'm ready for a challenge. I may not know what it is just yet, but I'm dreaming and hoping that it's one I can grow from.

So here's to looking up, growing, and knowing your full potential. Have faith that things will get better, that you will grow in the areas of your life that you feel are lacking. And never be afriad to look up and see thosee birds flying above your head...

Boots, Scarves, and Pumpkin Spiced Lattes

Courtesy of Mack's Apples in Londonderry, NH

It’s that time of year again, my favorite time of year. Fall! I celebrated this weekend by apple picking with my boyfriend, Phil (see his picture above...) I ceremoniously wore my boots to work today, I just couldn’t help myself! This is the season for apples and pumpkins, costumes and scarves. I usually go into hibernation mode, eating apple crisp, apple pie, and apple tarts all while caring less about the calories and fat content. Bring it on!

Autumn. Who can resist the mixture of cool and warm temperatures? Perfect for drinking a cup of coffee outside on the porch or sipping a glass of wine on the back patio… The mornings are cool and the afternoons, mild. It’s the perfect running season, which makes me more than happy (no longer do I have to worry about sweating profusely or not being able to breathe correctly due to the extra moisture in the air). These spectacular temperatures are caused by the Earth non-tilt; fall is characterized by an equinox, when Earth is neither tilted toward nor away from the Sun. (Yup, you can call me Sheldon…). Our equator is in perfect line with the Sun.

The weather that is created from this non-tilt creates instances when a light jacket and an accent scarf are not only considered fashionable but serve a purpose, especially here in New England. I love wearing a sweatshirt on a Sunday afternoon watching my beloved New England Patriots plow their opponents (more recently choke, but it’s early in the season people…don’t lose hope!). This behavior only feels right in September, October, and November. (I know that the football season extends into winter, but watching a game at Gillette is so much better when you don’t have to don 16 layers of clothing…)

Now, I know that Spring is supposed to be a time of new beginnings, but for some reason I feel this renewal in Fall. The world changes, from a world of green and luscious plants to a dreamscape of bright colors. Most trees release chemicals causing their leaves to change, chemicals that only exist when the weather changes from sweltering to cool. Yes, the leaves may fall off the trees, but it makes way for new life, new beginnings. It rids itself of the old and paves way for the new.

So here’s to a new beginning. Enjoy the weather fellow New Englanders! Buy a pumpkin spiced latte. Wear those boots proudly. And know that life keeps moving, changing, closing doors to one season and opening others to different opportunities, positive changes and exciting prospects. Here’s to Fall!

9/11

On this eleventh anniversary of this somber day, I am dedicating this post to remembrance. This day, exactly eleven years ago, I was laying in my bed thinking. It had been a day of confusion...I felt lost and scared and alone. I remember I was in sixth grade, sitting in what was supposed to be the block I had Spanish. A guidance counselor was telling us the most up-to-date information about the attacks, waiting for us to ask questions. I was nervous. What if I had family flying that day? My Nana was in Las Vegas trying to get home... Was she involved in any way?

After hearing that my Nana was safe in Las Vegas, I watched the news with my parents. I stared at the images of firefighters rummaging through steaming piles of scrap metal. It was had to believe that it was once intricately welded into some of the tallest buildings in the world. It was amazing to me; something so strong and so tall reduced to dust in a matter of minutes. How would we ever recover?

But we did. We became stronger. Our true colors shone, bright and true. Red, white and blue unfading, not running. We fought and we decided to rebuild. These actions and values are what built this country:  dedication, determination, pride and freedom. Two-hundred years later these are still present in each and every one of us. At the end of the day, even in this recession, we are proud of this country and happy to live within these boarders.

So tonight I thank those physically fighting overseas for our country; you are so brave and I owe my freedoms to you. My heart and prayers are with those who lost family members eleven years ago. You are always in our hearts. Always remember. Always.

*NYC*

Chick Flicks...

Last night, I was totally "girlie"... And how did I classify this notion you ask? Well, I did my nails. Yup, that's right. For the first time in about a month my nails are perfectly rounded, not too long or short, and are rocking a taupe-mauve polish--perfect for the "professional world."

And as if this was not "girlie" enough, I also reveled in the sounds and images of a good ol' fashion chick-flick...Younger versions of Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan starring in one of my favorites, Sleepless in Seattle. The perfectly witty film about a lonely, young, widower (Hanks), his caring and over concerned son, and the hopeful woman destined to make their lives complete (Ryan).

Now I'm not going to get into the unrealistic plot or the daring decision to place this winter love-story in one of the gloomiest cities in the United States. That would be too much and quite frankly ruin the happiness that I felt after watching the ending. I want to talk everything that Sleepless in Seattle is:

This film is a classic. I think it is fair to say that a majority of Americans have seen this film, or at least heard the title being thrown around in conversation. Classic scenes, like when Annie peels the skin of an apple in one long strip (coincidentally--or not--coinciding with Sam's favorite qualities about his late wife), are heat-warming to any woman in America.

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The cast of A-list actors is one of the best collaborations of our time: Tom Hanks, Meg Ryan, Rosie O'Donnell, Rita Wilson, Bill Pullman, David Hyde Pierce, etc., etc.. An Affair to Remember is strategically integrated throughout the film to reinforce the destiny of the two main characters. It is the home of countless memorable lines, some of which can't help but make you swoon or giggle:

"Now that was when people KNEW how to be in love. They knew it! Time, distance... nothing could separate them because they knew. It was right. It was real. It was..."- Annie Reed

"I am NOT going to New York to meet some woman who could be a crazy, sick lunatic! Didn't you see Fatal Attraction?" - Sam Baldwin

I love the feeling this chick-flick film gives me. In fact I am a fan of this genre in general. Most may be sappy and lack some genius writing (whether or not this film did is debatable). But they give a girl hope. Hope that love (not just for a partner) can be found, even in the most unlikely of circumstances. Hope in the magic of destiny. Hope in the existence of happiness. And hope that one of these days, my nails are actually something worth prioritizing...at least while watching a chick-flick.



Gotta Love the...

...nice cool breeze today. It's a small glimpse into my favorite season...Fall or Autumn depending on how politically correct you would like to be... But there was no better feeling on my bike ride this morning than this same cool breeze cooling me down as I huffed up the three hills on my route.

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Today on my commute into Boston, we passed the two of the newer wind turbines on route 93. These huge structures serve a purpose; they are a clean way of collecting renewable energy for consumers in the suberbs of this historical Massachusetts city. To some they may be ugly strcutures, defiling the Boston skyline. To me they give me hope that we, as a society, are opening our minds to new and innovative ideas; today the turning of the blades gave me hope that things will continue to turn, move and change.

Last night I was a little down in the dumps. Just one of those moods. I was a little upset that my plans to go for a bike ride with a friend were canceled. And this lead to feelings of discouragement at the fact that I was still living at home. Don't get me wrong, I love my family and am so thankful that they let me come home after I graduated college. I just saw myself living in Boston if I had a job there. And I'm not...A girl can get sad every now and again right?

But this windmill on my way to work this morning opened my eyes...life keeps going, moving, changing. It creates different expereinces, memories, and energies. And I need to stop thinking about how my "life plan" isn't playing out like I thought it would. I need to float, be flexable, move with the changing winds. Stay positive, stay strong, and keep the hope that I've had all my life; everything will work out!

Fresh Flowers, Fresh Hope

I have this obsession with flowers. I tend to buy them every other week at a farm in town. I do love the stereotypical favorites like roses, daffodils, or daises. But when it comes down to it, I am in love with all flowers. Peonies, violets, sunflowers, hydrangeas, even the dandelions (I know they are weeds, but I can't help it!). I feel a special connection to flowers... Some people may have bad memories with flowers; they are one of the most common gifts for the loss of a loved one and usually present at funerals... Others may not see the value in them; what purpose do they actually serve? Here is what they do for me...

Their spectacular earthy smell, the unbeatable splash of color in any room, and their elegant structure are some of the most common reasons for flowers being present in a home. For me, they serve as hope and simplicity. Coming into a room and seeing flowers immediately puts me at ease. These blossoms, which were previously growing on a larger stem and plant, are still beautiful. They hold their shape even though they are no longer connected to their root system. In some cases, they keep blooming for days and days. How is this possible? They are not receiving any more nutrients from their roots, other than a vase of water. They receive minimal sun, only that of artificial lights or the rays sneaking through windows. No insects (hopefully) will grace their petals and leaves. Essentially they are dying, their lives shortly coming to an end. Yet, they are still so magnificently beautiful....

The world these flowers knew is over as they knew it, yet they still blossom, bloom, and keep their fragrance. They display their beauty to the world around them showing just what they are made of. They are stripped down to nothing and they still shine. They don't know that their world is over, or if they do, they don't let the world know it... I want to be like a flower and seeing them gives me hope. Even in my darkest days, I want to bloom. I may see the end of the road that I am traveling on, but I will not act like it. I will hold my values and beliefs close to me while blossoming all along the way. I will be a flower for the world to see, be positive and strong through the ugliness of the world. Hold true to who I am, simple, a bud waiting to show its true colors!

 So buy flowers for people who are important to you with these thoughts in mind. Buy flowers for those that you may not like, it may brighten their day and give them hope... It would work on me!

(All photos were taken by Sarah Viafora.)